I want to to be emotionally distant and detached from my family but I don't know how. My dad is terribly abusive and such a jerk and my mom is no different than him. My mom is becoming like my dad and she's always taking her anger out on us by yelling and blaming us. She doesn't appreciate our help in the house either. She knows that dad isn't nice to us yet she seems to make it worse and not to care about her kids. So, therefore, I need to be emotionally detached from them a... read more
I hate hate hate myself. I hate that I hate myself, that I'm self-loathing. There's so many problems that I have and it's all just because of me. If I weren't so idiotic and emotional, I would not be so mad at myself. There's so many things to say and they're all just shameful. Why can't I just control them, they're -my- emotions-...why can't I stop myself from hating myself?
#selfhatred #depression #help #please #imsoscared
I changed my name, and while I still respond to my old name, one of my friends refuses to call me by my new name. What irks me is that whenever someone brings it up she gets this "secret" smile on her face, and she says "Well I don't have to do that." Like what, you think if you become my level 10 friend you get to call me by my old name? There's no special understanding or sister code between us telling you I wanted that. We're close enough for you to care and remember. Resp... read more
I have spent my entire life trapped in webs of my own construction. I've lied and lied and created a fantasy life to the point that I know struggle to separate the fact from the fiction. I've destroyed everything good and been to the darkest places. I am an innately sad, bad person.
I was recently told, "you're not worth the air you breathe", and there is truth to that. And yet, I can't say I'm the victim either, everything I have done to get to this point, I have done so wil... read more
Tomorrow would have been ur birthday ...i miss u daddy, more than ever. My heart has never healed even after these 9 looong years. the pain has never got easier, never think i will heal. i think about u every single day, i know ur with me. i just miss u. mom misses u. i wish this growing baby inside of me had a chance to meet u ;( ...i love u dad with all my heart <3 happy birthday
Does anybody have any ideas for how to decorate a room that's really bare for Christmas? My living room has two chairs, a lamp, two footrests, a little shelf for our modem, and nothing else; it's a gigantic room so it looks really empty and sad and I don't know how to decorate it for Christmas without making it just look emptier and sadder.
How the eff does he keep point the finger back at me when im tryna point out what he's doing!!??.....ur addiction to smoking is different from my lack of listening, grant it, i can sometimes wander when he talks but how the eff does that compare!? and u asking for a kiss pffft! kiss my white a**! that kiss does not mean everything is gravy cause i'm not done with yo a**! let the tension chill a bit, but im'a lay down some rules. u either take it or im gone. no time for BS! #r... read more
I'm a TA for an exercise science class. I've been working out for about ten years now, was in the wrestling team, and am in great shape. These damn students just don't listen when what I'm giving them is triple AAA grade training and it pisses me off. They don't transition when I tell them to transition and they don't follow proper form which I've explained several times over and over. I've constantly had to correct peoples bad form and try to maintain a positive attitude whe... read more
Ive fou nd Myself in an ungodly endless loop of seducing men. Thought I had My hormones in check when I met him. After spending the night together hes caught feelings, more than What I want to handle right now. I should tell him this isn't going to work out and he deserves better but the sex was amazinnggg. I'm at crossroads lol Again.
AHAHAH I JUST GOT BACK FROM RUSSIA AND ACCIDENTALLY SLEPT THROUGH SCHOOL AND LITERALLY NONE OF MY HOMEWORK IS DONE AND IM LITERALLY GONNA FAIL ALL MY s*** TOMORROW AND LIKE THIS IS NOT GOOD BUT I JUST FOUND SOME REALLY GOOD MUSIC SO SCREW THE PUBLIC EDUCATION SYSTEM FOR THINKING THAT bulls*** BUSYWORK IS MORE VALUABLE THAN ANALYZING MY EXPERIENCE IN A DIFFERENT CULTURE
#russia #school #procrastination #what
It's so weird... I used to be so shy and introverted. I wanted to be free to follow my own agenda at all times. I was never bored because I didn't feel the need to rely on others for entertainment. I was perfectly fine having no plans and doing what I wanted with my time
But now I'll do anything to get out of the house. Ever since I graduated high school I feel this need to constantly be busy. I always attend class even though I hate doing the homework, just to get out of th... read more
Ugh, I hate when my mother tells me that I should be more grown up (less sensitive) when I am emotionally expressing myself when angry or sad. But when she gets mad at me or anyone else in the family she has to give us the silent treatment sometimes to prove a point or 'cause she thinks speaking her mind is pointless. She would have a pouty look on her face too. My father isn't so great at being open either but he's not the focus so much this time. I guess no one including my... read more